Friday, 22 December 2023 09:55

It's all I want for Christmas

Written by  Mark Daniel
Christmas wishes: A Maserati Grecale Trofeo SUV. Christmas wishes: A Maserati Grecale Trofeo SUV.

Dear Santa, with just a week to go to Christmas Day, I’d thought I’d drop you a note.

Both Mrs. D and the very nice media lady from Ateco said I’d been a good boy in 2023, so they let me drive a Maserati Grecale Trofeo SUV for a week. I was wondering if you could bring me one just the same for the big day, then we could probably come to a deal where you could borrow it for a short while each year to get your job done.

Let me explain the benefits.

The powerplant is a V6, 3 litre and twin turbo unit, pushing out 520hp with a 0-100km sprint time of only about 3.5 seconds. This means there is a lot more horse or reindeer power than Rudolph and his mates.

The transmission is a ZF eight speed set up that genuinely offers seamless changes. This will allow you to burble along slowly as you drop prezzies down the chimneys or nail it between towns and cities.

A further bonus is the all-wheel drive system means you’re not going to get stuck on your route if there’s mud, gravel or – heaven forbid – snow on the ground.

The transmission can get through the 8 cogs quickly, particularly in the Corsa drive mode. However, the GT mode might be a better choice at night, as it tones down a glorious exhaust and reduces the dangers of waking the little ones too early on the big day.

If Mrs C. is putting in a few hours over the busy period, she’ll probably prefer the more subdued Comfort mode, which at the same time will give your ears a rest from being told, “You’re driving too fast.”

In the cockpit, she’ll also appreciate the metres of supple leather— no reindeer skins used here. With its intricate stitching, alongside outstanding adjustable lateral support bolsters, means you can get a move on as daylight on the 25th arrives. Of course, as you’d expect from a large SUV, the Grecale offers a voluminous 570 litres of boot space for a huge load of parcels.

Ahead of the driver’s seat, four screens keep you up to date with how things are going in a multitude of preferred settings. Meanwhile, a simplistic approach is taken for the transmission, a push button selection of Park, Drive, Neutral or Reverse – should be able to sort things out if you overdo the tipples and mince pies while you’re doing the rounds.

Depending on how heavy your right foot is – and the drive mode chosen – fuel consumption tends to be 13 to 14 litres per 100km. This isn’t too bad compared to the food bills I see for Mrs D’s horses and the cost of getting rid of the ‘exhaust’ they also produce.

Best of all, the Grecale doesn’t follow the typical Italian route of bold or outrageous. Rather, it exudes the glorious curves of Sophie Loren, oozing class and subtlety. So, if you find yourself at a red light next to a bling-loaded rival, you will have hit the pedal and left them in your wake before they realise what you’re driving.

Anyway, fingers crossed. Don’t worry about wrapping it – just leave the keys on top of the driver’s side wheel!

More like this

Cropsy's cutting-edge AI on the vineyard

A New Zealand startup is providing growers with vital information for daily operations and long-term vineyard management, using a unique and scalable AI vine scanner that gives a vine-specific view of disease, pruning, land productivity and yields. Forty Cropsy systems have been deployed throughout New Zealand, the United States and France, with more than 20 million vine scans conducted in the past 12 months.

Featured

Brendan Attrill scoops national award for sustainable farming

Brendan Attrill of Caiseal Trust in Taranaki has been announced as the 2025 National Ambassador for Sustainable Farming and Growing and recipient of the Gordon Stephenson Trophy at the National Sustainability Showcase at in Wellington this evening.

National

Machinery & Products

Calf feeding boost

Advantage Plastics says it is revolutionising calf meal storage and handling, making farm life easier, safer, and more efficient this…

JD's precision essentials

Farmers across New Zealand are renowned for their productivity and efficiency, always wanting to do more with less, while getting…

» Latest Print Issues Online

The Hound

Don't hold back!

OPINION: ACT MP Mark Cameron isn’t everyone’s cup of tea, but he certainly calls it how he sees it, holding…

Sorry, not sorry

OPINION: Did former PM Jacinda Ardern get fawning reviews for her book?

» Connect with Rural News

» eNewsletter

Subscribe to our weekly newsletter